Oscar Pistorius reveals he's writing a book, 'Pistorius' Pissed Stories'

Disgraced athlete, Oscar Pistorius, has revealed that he is in the process of writing his debut book, 'Pistorius' Pissed Stories', a semi-autobiographical detailing of various tales that have occurred when pissed-up.

The Truth, the Whole Truth and nothing like the Truth was given an early preview of one of the book's chapters titled, 'The Lie-in, the Bitch and the Walk-in Wardrobe', an account of a night Pistorius had in Las Vegas which involved a 22-hour sleep (or possible alcohol-induced mini-coma) and a particularly annoying woman whom he had locked in his hotel room's walk-in wardrobe for the entire time. In an excerpt from the chapter he says he beat charges for false imprisonment "because the judge recognised that she was obviously an annoying bitch."

In Harold Bloom's early review, the famed critic writes that "Pistorius succeeds in creating a structured and taut prose that perfectly demonstrates the excesses of celebrity culture, the dangers of alcoholic consumption and how quickly Cristal can get a man completely shit-faced. While the material is not ground-breaking, and certainly doesn't match Megan Fox's acclaimed autobiographical effort, embedded within the work is also a social commentary detailing the ease in which celebrities can pick up women."

Since being charged with the murder of his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius' advisors believe he needs to rehabilitate his image with a different demographic, namely the alcoholic community, and see the forthcoming book achieving this aim.

A source close to Pistorius said, "Oscar and his people know he's never going to be considered a hero again- that's a given. But alcoholics are a forgiving bunch and understand you do crazy shit when you're pissed."

Some believe the chapter, "Reeva after a Bottle of Ether", will be Oscar Pistorius' attempt to blame the recreational consumption of ether as a nightcap for his psychotic episode which led to him shooting his girlfriend four times, mistaking her for an intruder was using his toilet without permission- a transgression he describes as "up there with murder". The majority of the chapter was redacted in the preview release.

'Pistorius' Pissed Stories' is slated for release June 2013. Pistorius' release will likely be 2033.